Looking back at what Kelvin and I did for the wedding, we definitely had to compromise on certain things but we also stood firm on others. One of those is doing away with “traditional” wedding favours since no one really keeps those and neither are they particularly useful most of the time. Instead, we decided to donate whatever money we would have normally spent on wedding favours, and give it to charity. Specifically we decided to donate money to Education Generation (Ed Gen).
We chose Ed Gen for 2 reasons:
- We truly, completely support the work that they are doing. Our donation will help fund a student’s education somewhere in the world where it is needed. Go check out their page! Also check out their quick write up about our “Wedding for Impact“
- We know the founders (Kelvin’s past prof) and wanted to support their non-profit.
I’m not saying that you have to donate your wedding favour budget to a Ed Gen but I’d encourage you to consider it. Maybe it’s not Ed Gen, but another charity you’re passionate about. Since you’re likely spending that money anyways, why not send it to a good cause? We were met with resistance when we told our parents that we wanted to do this. They kept insisting on something, anything small, just as a takeaway, but we reasoned with them and made them realize why we wanted to do this. We wanted our wedding to be a reflection of us. We wouldn’t spend money on things that are useless or derive little value, so why would we want to do that at our wedding? We wanted to spend our money only on important things for the wedding, that would create some value for us: the food so everyone can eat, a venue for people to gather at, minister to marry us, photographer to capture lasting memories, and you get the point.
Bottom line: Make sure your wedding is a reflection of who you and your partner are, not a reflection of some culturally made up tradition that you don’t agree with or see need for.
Don’t worry, I don’t mean my marriage. Haha that is going incredibly strong and well and we are loving every moment of married life. What I’m talking about is the fact that I can’t believe the wedding is over. 9 months of preparation, stress and tears and it’s all done. No more calls to vendors, no more unwanted opinions, no more uncomfortable money talk with the parents. Wow, we can breathe a sigh of relief.
Some people told me that we would miss it, it’d feel like a void because in those 9 months leading up to the wedding, every spare moment and thought was spent on wedding planning. I don’t miss it at all! I feel so liberated to not have to plan a wedding anymore, but I am more than happy and excited to attend future ones. I don’t miss it for a few reason:
- Every decision we made had some emotional attachment with it. It wasn’t ours, but either our parents, grandparents, or friends and we felt that with each decision we were going to hurt some people but also please some others. Although we got most of what we wanted, it was difficult getting there. There were rounds of negotiations, some compromising, and a few tears.
- We have spare time again! We can just relax and enjoy our new apartment, go bike the seawall, grocery shop, and cook dinner. We kept saying during the planning process that we couldn’t remember what we used to do when we weren’t planning a wedding. We remember now!
- We can focus on our jobs again. We actually like our jobs and being in crazy wedding planning mode took away from our productivity and our ability to enjoy work. Now I’m ready to go full speed ahead with Granola Girl and Fusion Kitchen. Be ready for some good things to come.
What I do miss about wedding planning are:
- Getting to go on Pinterest and still consider myself productive. But actually, I manage the Pinterest page for Granola Girl so technically it’s still productive!
- Spending time with my mom talking flowers and even bickering over small things. This doesn’t exactly pertain to wedding planning, but it’s the fact that I’m moved out now and don’t see my mom and dad everyday, and I kind of miss them.
But what I’m looking forward to now is getting our place all prepped and ready for housewarming parties! Notice the plural? I say that because our apartment isn’t massive and it’d be a lot easier to have house warming parties in instalments.
Until the next post, have a great week!
…Double double that that, double this, double that, double double this that! Haha anyone remember that hand clapping game?
We’re 3 weeks away from the wedding! Did any other brides have this sort of just creep up on them? Just not too long ago we were saying “oh it’s 2 months to go!” and now we are at the 3 week mark! People often ask me now, “How’s the planning going? Is it really stressful?” and y’know what, it sure is! In fact, it’s doubly stressful because of the move. So on top of planning a wedding, we are also in this weird transition stage where half of our things are at home and half of our things are in our new apartment. But I have to say we truly do have the most wonderful friends. They were there for us, from helping pick up furniture, assembling it, and to cleaning the apartment. We are so incredibly blessed! Everything feels like a whirlwind and this weekend went by way too quickly.
Saturday was moving day. Kelvin and I moved a large majority of our stuff, besides essentials and clothes, to the new apartment and also had an IKEA bedframe, mattress, and sofa set delivered. We were hoping on having a wardrobe delivered as well, but we wanted to hold off on it because we weren’t sure of the exact measurements we had to work with. It’s always easier to add than to take away. But I think it was a good thing because even with all the help we had, the bed frame took close to 4 hours to assemble. Partly because our bedframe has drawers underneath and there were what seemed like a million bits and bobs. Then after everyone left we soaked in the apartment for a bit, since it finally started to look “live-able”. But soon after we had to head back out to IKEA, we wanted to get our dining table and chairs. Unfortunately, our waiting was in vain because it turns out their system doesn’t updated frequently enough and the table we wanted was sold out.
Sunday was anticipated to be a slow, relaxing day but it turned out to be super productive! Much more than expected. Mostly because I was supposed to work 1-5 but my shift ended early. So I called up Kelvin and asked if he wanted to do another IKEA run and we were on it. Thank goodness for his brother, Sam, coming along. Provided a lot of comedic humour for our errand running day. We picked up a wardrobe, TV stand, and bedding from IKEA and our apartment is getting that much closer to being truly “live-able”! Next we headed to Home Outfitters to buy some stuff off our registry since it was on sale and we get an additional 10% off. Then we made some short stops at Home Depot and Wal-Mart for some little things and reading this again, I’m surprised our apartment isn’t fully furnished yet!
We are going to spend this week slowly assembling the IKEA furniture we bought, while also checking things off our wedding to-do list. It’s getting so down to the wire and we have so many little loose ends we need to tie up. Please pray for us! I feel like we’re going to need it. Thanks for all your love and support 🙂